Dear Reader,
I hope this Love Letter finds you well.
Almost four months have gone by with almost no word from me and I'd like to come out from under the HSP blanket and sincerely apologise for my absence. I would also like to thank each and every one of you who has loyally and patiently waited for me while my life was turned upside-down 🫶 I feel I owe you an explanation:
Month 1: I filed for divorce, got prepared for the bureaucracy that was to follow and went off on a pre-planned holiday with the man I was about to divorce from. As you can imagine, it wasn’t all chocolate cake.
Month 2: I smacked my emotions up, decided to leave Switzerland forever, and my website and e-mail access were down during one of the most critical times in my life.
Month 3: I dealt with everything that goes with getting divorced and deciding to leave Switzerland forever, as well as the consequences of the e-mail and website access being down during one of the most critical times in my life.
Month 4: I finally made it to my new temporary destination, received all my belongings from Switzerland, am sorting through those, trying to get settled in, dealing with a family emergency, repairs, and - lo and behold - actually getting sick from all the stress and overload as a result of all of the above.
Sneak Preview of months 4,5 and possibly 6 and 7: 👀
I will still be dealing with everything that goes with getting a divorce and deciding to leave Switzerland forever; only I'll be in another country, renowned for its lack of organisation and world-class bureaucracy, but with access to my website and e-mail again.
Probably at snail pace. But it's OK - that’s a first world problem.
Oh and I have a new single coming out tomorrow! 😃 My last one as a member of iceEchoes! 🥺 If you like dance music, let me know if you’d like the link to have a listen to it.
While that doesn't sound like a lot, anyone who's been through a divorce knows the implications of divorcing - especially when you and your ex-partner get so entangled in each other's lives that you have to disentangle yourself again in a hundred ways and in a hundred directions, all at the same time. As if doing that in your mother tongue isn't hard enough, try doing that in two foreign countries with a rather complicated system and fancy terminology that suddenly leaves you feeling like you never spoke the languages in the first place.
Oh yeah, I'm fine, thanks. Who's even got time for emotions?? My entire life was just picked up to be transported overseas as cargo and I had to devote most of my time to getting that sorted, packed and ready to go.
Oh - not to mention all the things I didn't even mention!
One of those things has been to organise getting my money out of the country with me when I leave.
It should be an easy thing to do - after all, it is my own money, right? Should be a breeze to sort out.
Yeah, right! 😳
If I had half a million in my bank account, maybe. But since I don't, no Swiss banks will let me even keep an account open.
(I think it has since then gone up to a minimum of 2 million).
Back to my pension money, though. When you think about the fact that it is my aged pension we are talking about, here, money that I'd worked hard to earn... and shitty money at that, because I was employed for about 10 years in Switzerland under the minimum wage. Yes, I intend to take it out prematurely, because I'm now self-employed and leaving the country. Like, end of it. Finished. Fertig. Finito. Aus. ENOUGH!! How does that justify the thousands in deductions whacked onto each sum?! That's all the money I'll have to live on, while having to start my life all over again, at the age of 52! Unless you count the Spotify royalties of... oh... what does that amount to... $100 every 4 months???.....
It's fine if you're living on apples (have you seen the price of apples in Switzerland?!) and the proud owner of a city street corner and a blanket... but not if you're paying rent and yearning for a warm meal from time to time. Did I mention that the winter is fast approaching? 🥶
No-one wanted anything second-hand in Switzerland, so I've been giving my stuff away for free for weeks, now. Had a bunch of people walk through my house and take whatever they wanted. I’m happy my things went to a good home. I subtly tried to plug my own CD, as I’d casually laid a few copies right next to all the other things. They were ignored. I know, I'm a terrible sales person! And $10 is a lot, I get it. Which is why I released it as a digital download, too. Each digital song costs $1. People still complain about having to pay $1 for a single, yet forget that each one costs hundreds of hours and $$$ to produce... but it's OK, I get it. Everything's free these days. I bet The Beatles played live for nothing and The Human League gave their music away in the 80s, too. I'll remember to complain about the price next time I walk into a bakery and ask them for a free loaf of bread. And it better look like this, too:
We're also nearing the end of the year and people are tired... Have you noticed that? Around October each year, people begin to display a lack of concentration at work: mistakes keep being made; e-mails aren't being read properly; cases are being brushed off and sent back to the client, telling them they need to contact another department, instead of going that extra millimetre and passing it on to the department which just so happens that it's only one floor away. Others simply misplace the correspondence, or forget about it altogether... and so you generally end up chasing everything twice, often muttering that inevitable but awfully limiting phrase, "If you want anything done well, you might as well do it yourself" under your breath.
Yep. That's what it's like right now where I'm parked. Is that a good enough reason for getting worked up?
But I'm staying positive, because I know it'll all be over soon.
Or will it?...
Stay tuned, 'cause I'll share more of the juice in the next Love Letters! I’m taking all my subscribers - paid and free - with me on my nomadic adventures, so if you haven't subscribed already, now is the time to do so!
Love & Decibels,
xx jo xx
I'm a divorced HSP and its not easy. My divorce was about a decade ago now, so I'm happily ensconsed with another beloved. AND I had possibly with the most friendlyand kind divorce in the universe, and it was STILL a tough ride, so sending lots of love.
And those art pieces are fabulous!